Entropy

I miss the stress. I miss the pressure and the chaos. Order can be boring, and boredom kills.

I need to do something new.

Maybe I should get a new haircut, or have a new wallpaper. I’ll also change my mp3 playlist. I’ll buy a new shirt, and if my allowance permits (as if it will ever for anything), a new pair of pants and shoes. I’ll do something new, like, go to the gym, sleep really early, hit on a guy, drink Red Horse, learn to play the piano, shift to a new web browser or revert back to IE 6 with Yahoo! Toolbar, be cheerful, happy, and accommodating, read Danielle Steel or Paulo Coelho and their types, appreciate basketball, or send an SMS back at someone who just forwarded an inspiring but humorless quote. I'll have a new email signature, or call someone I consider a really good friend. And maybe this time I will listen.

Now that’s something new.

Delusion Angel

by David Jewell
as delivered by the Viennese(?) street poet in Before Sunrise

Daydream, delusion, limousine, eyelash.
Oh baby with your pretty face.
Drop a tear in my wineglass.
Look at those big eyes.
See what you mean to me.
Sweet-cakes and milkshakes.
I'm delusion angel, I'm fantasy parade,
I want you to know what I think.
Don't want you to guess anymore.
You have no idea where I came from.
We have no idea where we're going.
Latched in life, Like branches in a river,
Flowing downstream, Caught in the current,
I'll carry you, You'll carry me.
That's how it could be, Don't you know me?
Don't you know me by now?

Help

I need a good laugh. Somebody please give me a good laugh.

Spike

No, you don't. But thanks for saying it.

No, you don't. But thanks for saying it.

Conversations with Dead People

I hate doing sponsorship work/marketing/whatever you call it. It's bad enough that the activity is brain-addlingly "passive" (for lack of a better term) and so blah, but you also have to put up with really annoying secretaries and assistants who will keep telling you to follow up gas.

Hey big time boss, does it take so much of your time to approve a proposal from someone who just asks money from you? I mean, it's not a proposal to fire the finance EOs or merge with a much bigger firm. We just want your money in exchange for your logos in our posters and if you don't want to give us a cent of your profit, then JUST TELL US you don't want to. Hey, we know our place in the world, that's why we're asking for some dough. But we hope you have even the most basic courtesy to tell us upfront when you decide against giving. Hindi yung ipapa-follow up mo ng ipapa-follow up tapos wala ka namang ginagawa. Anak ng.

And don't give me that "that's how it works" or "we're too busy" crap. As far as I know, courtesy is still being taught in our schools (unlike good communications and science). And what does it say of your competence (or lack of it) if you can't respond to matters brought up with you? You're too busy to deal? Maybe we should've actually sent a proposal to fire you. We don't need your corporate angas. Angasin nyo'ng mukha nyo.

I can take rejections, even angry ones, but please don't keep me hanging.

And when you give telephone numbers or names of people to follow up, please make sure that the phone will be picked up, or that the person is reachable. You can't imagine the amount of time I've wasted calling numbers that just keep ringing everyday for a week. Your bosses should know that you are not attending to phone calls which could've been from the Sultan of Brunei.

Or at the very least, please make sure they exist?

Older and Far Away

Things are noticeably different to me lately. It seems that the more I get stressed, the clearer things appear to me. The question isn't whether I can think straight or not but rather, if I can think about everything on such short time. And such small skull-bound brain.

Too little time to pretend and pass myself off as somebody I'm not. It's true after all; time makes you forget. Just imagine how much you'll lose having too much of it. Time.

I welcome change. Welcome back.